Zach Galifianakis made me laugh so hard at a show many years ago in Aspen that other people in the audience turned to give me the, “It wasn’t that funny” glare.
And here’s another example of why he’s one of my favorites. Watch this video for Fiona Apple’s “Not About Love.” (The look he gives her after the lyric “Became dialogue as a diagram of a play for blood” is the best.)
Dear Eddie Izzard,
Sorry I made an ass out of myself standing next to you on a staircase. See, Jessica really likes you, and I do, too, but I wanted her to see she was standing next to you. I’m sorry I kind of pushed her into you while you were trying to dial your cell phone. You looked like you were having a hard time acclimating while walking up the stairs. The stairs never get easier, do they? Heh-heh-heh. Anyway, YOU’RE AWESOME AND WOOOO! [Virtual flashing]
How come you don’t come out to Los Angeles? I think you’d really like it here. We’ve got lots to do, and there are plenty of things for you to cover. Think of the traffic jams you could cause! Also, you’d do really well out here: you’re white.
Let me know when you’ve got a headshot,
US Comedy Arts Festival, 2005
In the corner of this condo, by the couches, we have found wireless.
I do not recommend trying to carry a stack of wood and two bags of groceries five blocks, in the snow, in the dark, by yourself. What seemed like a good idea last night became one of the dumbest things I’ve ever attempted. It took twice as long to walk home, as I kept having to stop, put everything down, gain my breath again, and then try to carry all of those things — in gloves — while walking on an icy street. I am dumb. I’ve also never really experienced life with snow. Continue reading
I can’t say I wish I had more time to write here, because I’m pretty happy with what is keeping me so busy right now. But it’d be nice to have more time here to write down what life has been like, mostly for me to have later (because this is supposed to be a diary, after all). I’m back at work on the Oxygen show for a few weeks, doing rewrite work on the pilot, and that has been much more fun than I could have predicted. I’m finishing a recap. I’m finishing the latest draft of the WGAW screenplay. I’m working on the book revisions. And in a couple of days I leave for Aspen. Continue reading
First of all, I totally screwed up, and forgot to include this as a squishy splash page nominee. My apologies. You can vote for this one even if you’ve voted before.
So, the show opens this evening. Last night, around midnight, I had finished performing it in front of real live people for the first time. Guess what? They liked it.
my bad-ass timing
I have a problem with timing.
Perhaps it’s actually a good sense of timing, with a dash of complete obliviousness. My horrible moments often turn into very good stories, but the initial shock of what I just unknowingly did usually shadows out the humor for a short time.
mostly because i feel so scattered
I have spent way too much time playing with you. I know that you are my newest toy, but my poor webcam didn’t even get a chance to snap a neat Cal photo before I left it standing in its own lens cap. I am experiencing a technology overload.
alright, at heart, it’s a cop-out entry
If Lenny Kravitz keeps this up, mark my words, in a couple of years there’s going to be an insecticide commercial on television called “Fly Away.”
In the unexplained phenomena category:
Both of my ears are pierced. I used to wear two small silver hoops in them about two years ago. I lost the earrings, and I haven’t worn a pair of earrings since. Last month my right ear’s piercing got infected. I thought it was odd, but decided that weird stuff happens, and I took care of it. Now the other earring hole is infected. What up, yo? I thought they only got infected when you wore crappy earrings. I haven’t even done anything to them.
(insert heavy sigh here)
Wow. You know, I knew yesterday was going pretty bad, but it only got worse.
We got the phone call. We aren’t going to Aspen.
Let’s see how I handled this last year…
Great. Good to know that it’s not exactly the same, I mean, at least this time I have a different job. I have quite a few jobs, really.
I could give you all of the reasons they gave us, but they really don’t mean anything because they aren’t the real reason. The real reason is they only liked the two people they picked to go this year. Any excuse could easily be the same excuse they’d give as to why they liked us. It boils down to what they want. This year, just like last year, it was almost us but not quite.