Many years ago (I mean, like, ten years ago…not like earth-bursting-with-lava many years ago), my sister got engaged. She has since married and had two beautiful children as beautiful and lovely as she is. But, as happens with marriages, she got engaged first. That is the story I am here to tell today. Sidebar of…

Thinks on it a bit, reckons ultimately, “Don’t know.” Incidentally, the first suitor able to ape successfully Henry’s voice saying, “Oh Punky” will have me as his slave. Forever. And now. Pam quotes emails about books as a means of using her powers for good. I’m whatever the opposite of that is. I said I…

Awww, thanks for watching as to the status of my back, Pam. This must be why unpopular opinions are called “unpopular opinions.” The silent majority has emailed me accordingly. And the revolution will NOT be blogged. I know the vast majority of media pundits have already sounded off on the topic and I know the…

I’m done. You can tell those fancy scienticians to put down their fancy adding calculators, because I figured it out again: the last digit of Pi is a question mark. I kept trying not to glance at the last page, lest I accidentally find god before the kid found land. But then suddenly, I turned…

That was some sassy verse, indeed, Pamela. Thank goodness I showed up when I did to slum the place up a bit. Recently, in the throes of utter delirium, Tracie and I wrote the first eight haikus in a collection we will one day publish as a slim, artsy-looking volume of poems entitled At Tim…

“And sweet patient Dan let it go on for at least twenty miles.” And then vetoed every music suggestion — from both of us, for some reason — for the next two-hundred. Gotta go. Hurricane’s here.

Things I said I did yesterday: *A lot of utterly important, indispensable work. Things I actually did yesterday: *Posted to blog. *Typed half of outline of new, even more commercially-inviable musical and didn’t email it to Tracie on account of all of that indispensable work mentioned just above, there. *TWoP forums. *Refilled Brita. *Mused on…

“Turtle shells were very handy.” (p. 213)

Incidentally, Stephen Colbert is the funniest man in the history of television. Incidentally, I’ve been officially Friendster-free for ten full days. And not one person has noticed. Also, incidentally? This hurricane isn’t going to TOUCH us. So everyone just. Calm. Down.

I’ve been on every plane in America. Thank you, Pamela, for the greatest time of my young (shut up, I’m young) life. I’m exhausted, disheveled, laundry-less (well, the clean kind), in possession of a new job, and completely unsure as to where I am at any given moment. But LA was the most fun, and…