For when you’re nursing your child and your mom stands super close to watch it while she chats, and then she gets so caught up in the moment that she leans in and kisses the baby’s head, just centimeters away from your bare breast.
Because that is what happened to me yesterday.
Oh, does that not happen to you on a Thursday? Then I guess maybe we don’t need a whole word for it. Maybe just a therapy session.
“Lactoproximity.”
And Brett wins in the first comment.
Seriously.
How about a word for when you are nursing in public and a stranger smiles at your baby and then that smile slowly turns to horror when they realize what is happening and that they have just smiled at your boob. And then they have to decide how to play it off – at least here in Seattle, where it would be a major faux pas to be horrified by nursing in public, so they then have to communicate via facial expression that they were horrified by the possibility that you thought they were leering, not the fact that you were nursing. I suppose other places they can just follow up with a look of disgust that boobies exist.
I would like for there to be a word for it because it happened to me. Commence therapy!
I’m suggesting awkward.
At least it wasn’t your dad…
That is my everyday because my baby has an older sibling…he’s only three, but he still gets too close for comfort when brother is nursing.
How about realizing that not that many years ago it was you nestled up to your Moms bosom and so really, you’ve been in “Lactoproximity” hundreds of times before…and didn’t even really realize it.
I’m going with
awwwwwwwwwwkward.
I think it’s sweet, but my mom and I are close. What’s fun is the reaction strangers have when they get a glimpse of your boob while you’re nursing. They look away like they’re terrified of being accused of ogling. Now THAT’s fun.
My FIL did that to me. Twice. My sympathies.
That needs a different word: and that word is “Gag.”
Oh my gosh that made me laugh out loud.
BECAUSE eww that’s my breast, mama.
At least it was your mother. IVE had it done with MY MIL!!!!!!!!!!
PTSD
My own mom, I don’t mind so much. My mother-in-law committing lactoproximity…that was a bit weird.
That happened to me. Several times. Except it was my older sister. For some reason when I said to her, “Hi, that’s my boob right there, can you not do that right now?” she didn’t take that as a hint that it made me uncomfortable. Huh. That pretty much sums up our whole relationship, now that I think about it.
What did I win? Cuz I ain’t got it yet.
I hope it’s a pony.
I was gonna say boobus-interruptus but lactoproximity is better, Damn it.
Leave a Reply
You must be logged in to post a comment.