I’m No Edward Norton

how poker is ruining my life

I know too many
with a Gemini birthday.
My wallet is bare.
“Hi, sleepy pamie.
Quit playing poker at night.
You look like shit, girl”.

I stayed up real late.
I lost seven dollars and
I forgot to pack.

How to survive work?
My ten hour shift is long.
Hey, coffee, coffee!

Coffee not enough.
Here’s a pack of hot cocoa.
Put that in the mug.

My coffee mocha
Tastes like Xeney’s garden.  Ick.
Starbucks, I am not.

Birthday Week is done.
Now it’s Eric’s turn to dance.
He wants his gifts now.

Torturing the boy
was more fun when i wasn’t
hiding all his gifts.

My Oscar the Grouch
Beanie Baby just told me
that ants rule the world.

I believe Oscar.
I don’t doubt the powers of
talking pricey fads.

Hallucinations.
Not sleeping makes them rise up.
Gives you bad grammar.

My coffee is now
singing the macarena.
“Mama said”, indeed.

Captain Kangaroo
never dealt with this madness.
I’m losing my mind.

Close the office door.
Pretend I’m in a meeting.
Sleep for three hours.

Office mate is pissed.
Perhaps I shouldn’t have drooled
on her when I slept.

It’s her own fault, though.
She knows I toss in my sleep.
She should move her desk.

Talking Oscar says
“I THINK CRACK IS THE WAY, BITCH!”
I understand him.

I’m going crazy.
I keep hearing this ringing.
There it is again.

I may start screaming
if that noise doesn’t stop soon.
My eyes are bleeding.

THAT’S IT!  I WILL QUIT!
The ringing has driven me.
Send out the e-mail.

“Take that, you bastards.”
that’ll teach ’em to fuck with
me on a Thursday.

Stick it to the man.
But the ringing keeps going.
Oh.  Hey.  It’s my phone.

Calling the help desk.
“You must erase my e-mail.
Why are you laughing?”

Ms. Pamela Depp.
“Mrs. Johnny Depp is here.”
I think that sounds good.

Boss is on the phone.
Blah, blah, blah, fired, blah, blah.
Always the same thing.

Wake up at my desk.
E-mail fiasco a dream.
I have to pee now.

People are staring.
Button prints on my forehead.
Slept on my keyboard.

Back at desk, relieved.
Time to pay all of my bills.
Surf the net instead.

I learned something new.
The Spelling Bee kids scare me.
But they read journals.

Using post-it notes
I have just planned my wedding.
Just need a groom, now.

When will the day end?
Time to wander halls real fast.
Looks like I’m busy.

Hold a light bulb up
to my forehead.  Ow! I think
I’ve got a fever.

Sweet.  I’m going home.
Damn.  Everyone’s at work still.
I clean house naked.

Forgot about the
package man coming over.
Don’t need a tip now.

I need to pack still.
But I’m sure I’m just going to
play poker all night.

Birthday week is now
So, tomorrow I’m with E.
See you guys Monday.

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