music, panties, rushmore, and shel
In honor of the “lost” Beatles song that has been uncovered and is scheduled to be released this summer for some sort of Yellow Submarine hype, I’ve decided to uncover lost Squishy entries– entries that never saw it to the website for one reason or another.  Sometimes I never finished them.  Sometimes I changed my mind.  Sometimes I decided to write something else.  Sometimes I had just written too much and I wanted to cut something out.

Here, exposed, are the bits and pieces of the Lost Squishy Entries.


Here’s one where I was discussing the hits to my tracker….

As we can see, “panties” is what really brings people in.  I’m aware that these people probably aren’t getting what they are looking for, but I don’t mind.  The best one so far has been, “pictures of sister pantie drawer.”  It seems boring, but I guess people are into all sorts of stuff, right?

123   41.94%                panties
16     5.36%                  squishy

the difference in people searching for this site between “Squishy” and “panties” is a little depressing, so we’ll just go on.

15     5.03%                  peeking

and for some reason, people are always “peeking” at panties, not just looking at them.

7       2.34%                  pamie

there’s the first mention of looking for me.  That’s probably my mom.  All seven times.

5       1.67%                  at
4       1.34%                  free
4       1.34%                 out
4       1.34%                 night
4       1.34%                 monks

these seem to be all looking for my comedy troupe…

4       1.34%                 pantie

an alternate spelling…

3       1.00%                 scripts

probably my one shot at selling a play…

3       1.00%                 antielmo

ah, back, back, back in the day I had an anti-elmo site.  This was from my first UT website.  I still think Elmo steals all of Grover’s stagetime, but alas, UT tore down the page after my graduation.

3       1.00%                 and
3       1.00%                 to
3       1.00%                 pamies

“and.”  someone searched on “and” and got my page.

2        0.67%                anti
2        0.67%                used
2        0.67%                soiled
2        0.67%                skirts
2        0.67%                twentyfour
2        0.67%                the
2        0.67%                peeping
2        0.67%                im
2        0.67%                up

more peeping up.  I got a lot of “peeking/peeping up skirts to see panties.”

2        0.67%                elmo

1        0.33%                car
1        0.33%                game

I don’t know why “car” or “game” would point you to my site, unless you were looking for “car panties” or “game where sister shows panties.”

1        0.33%                where
1        0.33%                with
1        0.33%                sketch

again, my one chance for fame and fortune.

1        0.33%                lighthouse


1        0.33%               pantiessports

Coming to ESPN2, the deuce!  Exxtreme PANTIESSPORTS.

1        0.33%               sports
1        0.33%               wid

this is back from “gettin’ squishy wid it,” i think…

1        0.33%               latest
1        0.33%                tom
1        0.33%               sex

I would have hoped that “Sex” would have made more hits, but can you imagine how far down on the list my site would be if you simply typed in ‘sex’?  This person was determined.

1        0.33%               wwwpamiecom
1        0.33%               vinyl
1        0.33%               texas
1        0.33%               boobs
1        0.33%              sale

I like to think these were all together:  when I think “vinyl texas boobs sale”, I think “pamie.”

1        0.33%               plays
1        0.33%               checkhas

either someone is playing a hip game or they meant chickas.  either way it’s funny.

1         0.33%              sister
1         0.33%             pictures
1          0.33%             mpeg

i’ve never had mpeg’s on the site, but whatever.


I’m tired, I’m bored.  I don’t know what to write.  Blah, blah, blah, blah… oh, look, there’s something in my coffee.  Why do I have this compulsion to drink it and then shout, “Ew!  There was something in my coffee and then I drank it!  I feel terrible, I should go home and sleep this off!”

Oh yeah, that’s why.


Hey, I don’t have to have an opinion on everything, you know.  That sounds so stupid. I sound so stupid.  I’m stupid.

Here.  I’ll finally admit it.  I’m a big stupid stupid head.  Full of stupidosity.  Dumb.

So stupid I had to make up a word that describes how stupid I am.  Stupidosity.

I need a vacation.


I’ve become an addict.
I click my mouse button five thousand times a day..It started harmlessly enough.  I work with two computers, and I have a bit of down time at this job, so lately I’ve been surfing the web for pages that inspire me to write about something, if I’m not coming up with anything right away.  I check the news.  I read E! Online, I surf around to get news.  And then I start checking other daily web pages that I love…and then sometimes I check again to see if there’s anything new.  I check my guestbook.  I check to see the counter on my page…I check to see who’s e-mailed me, and then the cycle starts all over until I’ve come up with something to write about.

I’m sure I’m not the only one who does this, and I don’t know if it’s necessarily unhealthy… I’m just a little bored at work, and lots of online journals bother me.  I’ve found a few that I love, and I just keep peeking (like when you look downstairs at the Christmas Tree on Christmas Eve to see if Santa’s come yet).

In any event, by the time I get home I don’t want to look at another computer, and my writing gets neglected.  I haven’t written a play in a few months, and I miss doing it.

But I can’t stop the clicking.  I check all sorts of links, I sign all sorts of guestbooks, I just keep surfing the web, hoping to find some sort of inspiration to keep me going until I get to go home.

Man, are we reaching some sort of list mania lately or what?  You can’t go anywhere without finding the top 100 reasons why you should be there and four people bitching about three things that should have been on the list and two that shouldn’t.  I guess with the century coming to a close, we should expect this, but my big fear is that next year we will have millenium lists.  The top 1000 pretty girls.  The top 1000 streets in America.

Oh, what the hell… here’s pamie’s top 100 favorite albums.
but the problem is, I don’t want to rate them, because I love them all.  If stranded on a desert island I’m only allowed five cd’s… I’ll go insane and start chewing on my foot.

Here goes:

1.  Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band– Beatles
2.  The Colour and the Shape– Foo Fighters
3.  The Lion and the Cobra– Sinead O’ Connor
4.  Nothing’s Shocking-  Jane’s Addiction
5.  Rage Against The Machine- Rage Against the Machine
6.  Weezer– Weezer
7.  OK Computer– Radiohead
8.  The Bends–Radiohead
9.  Life’s Rich Pageant– R.E.M.
10.  Abbey Road– Beatles
11.  Siamese Dream– Smashing Pumpkins
12.  Night Music– Tones on Tail
13.  Ten– Pearl Jam
14.  Mother’s Milk– Red Hot Chili Peppers
15.  Nevermind– Nirvana
16.  Crazysexycool– TLC
17.  Ella Fitzgerald sings Cole Porter
18.  In My Tribe– 10,000 Maniacs
19.  The Immaculate Collection– Madonna
20.  Pale– Toad the Wet Sprocket
21.  Ritual de lo Habitual– Jane’s Addiction

(I think I only got out the CDs that were on my actual desk before I quit.  The rest of that list is not here…) But if I were to add to the rest of that list…

22. London Calling– the Clash
23.  Version 2.0– Garbage
24.  Revolver– the Beatles
25.  Paul’s Boutique– the Beastie Boys
26.  Core– Stone Temple Pilots
27.  Pinkerton– Weezer
28.  You’ve Come A Long Way, Baby– Fatboy Slim
29.  Tapestry– Carole King
30.  The Miseducation of Lauryn Hill– Lauryn Hill
31.  Live Through This– Hole
32.  Tidal– Fiona Apple
33.  Ill Communication– Beastie Boys
34.  The Fat of the Land– Prodigy
35.  Doolittle– the Pixies
36.  Come On Pilgrim– the Pixies
37.  Surfer Rosa– the Pixies
38.  Goo– Sonic Youth

You know, I think this is why I quit it the last time.  As I type them, I start thinking of ones that I’m going to forget, and then I forget them and then I sit and try to remember what I wanted to add and I just realize that I have more than 100 favorite albums and I know that I’m not going to put them all in….

so, this entry will remain lost.


Looking over these entries now, I think maybe they should have stayed lost.  That’s sort of how I feel about this new Beatles song, which is how I felt about the last two “New” Beatles songs.  They should stay lost.  They weren’t presented for a reason.


Last night I saw Rushmore, which wasn’t like what I had expected.  I hadn’t seen any trailers or read any reviews, so all of my knowledge on this film was by word of mouth.  I had heard it was “hysterical,” or “so damn funny.”  It really is a dark little film.  I liked it, though, I liked it quite a bit, actually.  What I hadn’t heard anyone comment on, however, was how Rushmore is the exact opposite of The Graduate.  You take The Graduate, and flip all of the relationships and conflicts to the exact opposite and you get Rushmore.  Complete with sitting in the bottom of the pool scene and Simon and Garfunkelesque music playing throughout the film.

I’m really tired today.  And I’m bummed
I really am.

Where The Sidewalk Ends

There is a place where the sidewalk ends
And before the street begins,
And there the grass grows soft and white,
And there the sun burns crimson bright,
And there the moon-bird rests from his flight
To cool in the peppermint wind.

Let us leave this place where the smoke blows black
And the dark street winds and bends
Past the pits where the asphalt flowers grow
We shall walk with a walk that is measured and slow,
And watch where the chalk-white arrows go
To the place where the sidewalk ends.

Yes we’ll walk with a walk that is measured and slow,
And we’ll go where the chalk-white arrows go,
For the children, they mark, and the children, they know
The place where the sidewalk ends.

– Shel Silverstein

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