Tag: Dork
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Some Things About Myself That I Need To Work On
* When I’m in a public restroom and a lady comes out of the stall, I really want to stop saying “Thank you” to her when I pass her on my way in. And I mean, I really thank her in a genuine way, every time. There is no need for this thank you. It’s…
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This Week in “Somtimes I’m Stoopid.”
This week has taught me a few lessons I should’ve learned long ago. I’ll share them with you on the unlikely chance I’m not the last person to learn these things. First: I got internet scammed.
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More Tales from the Accidental Asshole: The Egg Lady
I don’t usually go to Halloween parties. I don’t like to dress up in a costume, and this is the part where you get to snark, “Is that because you’re usually wearing some kind of crazy outfit anyway?” to which I will say, “Yes.” But I’m not a hater, and I don’t think it’s stupid…
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Resolution 2012: Stop Saying “Sort Of.”
I don’t usually make resolutions for the New Year, maybe because it’s too easy to put off any big decision until December 31st. If I need to do something, I try to put it on my weekly to-do list so that it gets done. I also don’t usually tell you guys my plans to like,…
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Why I’m Missing Mindy Kaling’s Book Signing (More Proof I Can Never Be Cool)
So I’ve had this cold. It’s been going on for over a week at this point, which is ridiculous. Listen, if I go through all the trouble to be responsible and get the flu shot before flu season, I shouldn’t be able to get sick for ten days straight with anything. I should get credit…
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The day I have to finally admit that I might be rapidly turning into Hoda.
I’ve mentioned before, but probably not on pamie.com, that I watch Kathie Lee and Hoda most mornings. That’s not exactly true — I have it on while I’m working. Depending on which part of the house I choose to work from that day (couch if I’m feeling frustrated, desk if I’m feeling self-punishey), I will…
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Tales from the Accidental Asshole: The Wine Tasting
I am not the best when it comes to names and faces. I will remember one or the other, but I cannot seem to put them together. And I’ve even tried the thing where you hear someone’s name and then you imagine them wrapped up in their name, like “Monica Berg” becomes a cheeseburger moaning…
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Acts of Incompetent Genius
I had this sudden idea the other night while I was eating a steak dinner and watching some Frontline special about technology (settle down, boys, this girl’s taken) that it’d be an interesting, potentially time-saving experiment to see if I could keep myself from Wonder Killing for an entire week. For me, that means not…
