Sometimes I try to shield the truth from you because I don’t want you to find out that sometimes all this hard work can be even more terrifying than sticking with The Plan. If you knew that having a book comes with it a slew of unanswerable questions about your future, friendships and talent, would that make you less likely to give it a try? I might keep the scary stuff away from you sometimes, but luckily Gwen doesn’t. (If it makes you feel better, Gwen, I never even got a Publisher’s Weekly review, and apparently “EVERYBODY” can get one of those. They made it sound like they’re handed out by the porn barkers in Vegas.)