La La Loser

homeless and unemployed.

Yeah, so this isn’t going very well. Basically I’ve seen every apartment that’s available right now. Some have sent us screaming and running away before we’d even go in. I have a rule that I don’t want to live in any apartment that looks like Daniel Laruso once threw his bike in a dumpster and discovered Bonsai gardening in. There are a lot of those.

I found about four apartments that I like. The problem is that they are all going to take about a week to decide if they like me. A week. That’s me possibly stuck here for a week waiting to find out if they want me. If they don’t… then I have to find another place to live.

I don’t have that much time.

So, what I might do is just go back to Austin and wait to hear what those people say. If in a week they all turn me down, then I’ll move in with my friend Ray. Eric and I will share his large apartment for a few months while we get settled and find jobs and make enough money and have enough time to wait two weeks to decide if we’re good enough to be new tenants.

I love Ray. Everyone needs to get themselves a Ray.

stee is working on his recap while I sit on the floor writing an entry. I know you want stee’s empty house gossip, but that will have to come tomorrow after I take him to the airport. Right now the only gossip I can give you is that he is very meticulous about his Road Rules recaps. I finally got his cat to like me, since I brought her two Texas sized toys.

Other than that we have just been driving from vacant apartment to vacant apartment. How nice of a friend is he? He totally dropped what he was doing to drive my ass all around LA for two days straight. Yesterday we were out from nine in the morning when he picked me up from the airport until eight at night. This morning I started making calls at nine and we just got back from the last apartment (we didn’t go in. it was incredibly scary) at six. Tomorrow I’m sort of on my own, if I can’t get ahold of my friend Jessica. This terrifies me. I have to drive stee to LAX tomorrow and find my way back. I think this is some sort of test. If I make it back here without crying, I might just survive this town.

Here’s one thing I’ve noticed that’s very different about LA than Austin. Sure, there are tons of differences, I know. But this one has been on my mind. Austin is so small that we have one local celebrity homeless person. His name is Leslie. He lives on Sixth Street. He wears a bikini most of the time and has a box that stays on Sixth Street where he writes his manifesto. Everyone knows his name. I’ve seen him do print ads for dot com companies. This town has Angelique, a plastic-surgery nightmare that has a rich husband that buys her billboards all over the city. She doesn’t do anything. There’s a number where you can call and book her for events. Apparently she just drives up in a pink car and waves. Her claim to fame is being half-naked all over the city. Leslie is half-naked on one square block.

I will hopefully be going home soon. I miss home. I miss my cats. I need to figure out where I’m going to end up. I don’t like being unemployed and homeless. I miss knowing my way to my front door.

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