footprints

and lack of sleep

I’m exhausted.

Last night was the worst. I think in the beginning of the evening I was talking in my sleep, and I believe Eric and I had a conversation about him escaping from El Salvador because he was considered evil. Shortly thereafter a car alarm went off. And not those nice, polite car alarms where the guy goes running out in the rain apologizing and turning off the little chirps. It was one of those alarms that gives you the total bedlum. WEEE-OOOH! WEEE-OOOH! WEEE-OOOOH! WAAH! WAAH! WAAH! WAAH! PrrrrIIIII! PrrrrrIIIII! PrrrrIIII! WooooOOOOOOOIIEEEE! WooooOOOOOOOIIEEEE! WooooOOOOOOOIIEEEE! WooooOOOOOOOIIEEEE! Piiiiooooooouuuuu! Piiiiooooooouuuuu! Piiiiooooooouuuuu! Piiiiooooooouuuuu! WEE! WEE! WEE! WEE! WEE!

And then it would shut off. I’d put my head back on the pillow.

WEEE-OOOH! WEEE-OOOH! WEEE-OOOOH! WAAH! WAAH! WAAH! WAAH! PrrrrIIIII! PrrrrrIIIII! PrrrrIIII! WooooOOOOOOOIIEEEE! WooooOOOOOOOIIEEEE! WooooOOOOOOOIIEEEE! WooooOOOOOOOIIEEEE! Piiiiooooooouuuuu! Piiiiooooooouuuuu! Piiiiooooooouuuuu! Piiiiooooooouuuuu! WEE! WEE! WEE! WEE! WEE!

Eric would get up to shut the window, but the alarm would stop. He’d stare at the window for a second, decide it was all over, and get back into bed.

WEEE-OOOH! WEEE-OOOH! WEEE-OOOOH! WAAH! WAAH! WAAH! WAAH! PrrrrIIIII! PrrrrrIIIII! PrrrrIIII! WooooOOOOOOOIIEEEE! WooooOOOOOOOIIEEEE! WooooOOOOOOOIIEEEE! WooooOOOOOOOIIEEEE! Piiiiooooooouuuuu! Piiiiooooooouuuuu! Piiiiooooooouuuuu! Piiiiooooooouuuuu! WEE! WEE! WEE! WEE! WEE!

Eric got up and shut the window.

WEEE-OOOH! WEEE-OOOH! WEEE-OOOOH! WAAH! WAAH! WAAH! WAAH! PrrrrIIIII! PrrrrrIIIII! PrrrrIIII! WooooOOOOOOOIIEEEE! WooooOOOOOOOIIEEEE! WooooOOOOOOOIIEEEE! WooooOOOOOOOIIEEEE! Piiiiooooooouuuuu! Piiiiooooooouuuuu! Piiiiooooooouuuuu! Piiiiooooooouuuuu! WEE! WEE! WEE! WEE! WEE!

It was coming from the living room back door. It was all around our apartment. It also set off the cats.

Brrrr! Brrreeeeeahhh! Brreeeieiieiei! MwwwrrraaahHHHHHRRRHHH! RrrrEEEAh!

WEEE-OOOH! WEEE-OOOH! WEEE-OOOOH! WAAH! WAAH! WAAH! WAAH! PrrrrIIIII! PrrrrrIIIII! PrrrrIIII! WooooOOOOOOOIIEEEE! WooooOOOOOOOIIEEEE! WooooOOOOOOOIIEEEE! WooooOOOOOOOIIEEEE! Piiiiooooooouuuuu! Piiiiooooooouuuuu! Piiiiooooooouuuuu! Piiiiooooooouuuuu! WEE! WEE! WEE! WEE! WEE!

“Everyone, shut up!” I started screaming. It seemed that someone was intentionally setting off that car alarm over and over. I pictured some gilted girlfriend staring up at her ex’s window, her hand right over some Camaro and he’s out the window shouting, “Just go home!” and she’s all, “NO! You come down here and talk to me!” “I’m going to sleep!” SMACK!

WEEE-OOOH! WEEE-OOOH! WEEE-OOOOH! WAAH! WAAH! WAAH! WAAH! PrrrrIIIII! PrrrrrIIIII! PrrrrIIII! WooooOOOOOOOIIEEEE! WooooOOOOOOOIIEEEE! “Bastard!” WooooOOOOOOOIIEEEE! WooooOOOOOOOIIEEEE! Piiiiooooooouuuuu! Piiiiooooooouuuuu! Piiiiooooooouuuuu! “Son of a–” Piiiiooooooouuuuu! WEE! WEE! WEE! WEE! WEE!

Apparently the girlfriend left and started a fire somewhere else because that began the series of fire trucks, ambulances and police cars that were suddenly driving by my apartment and slowing down right outside the window. And because of all of the noise and wind and rain…

WEEE-OOOH! WEEE-OOOH! WEEE-OOOOH! WAAH! WAAH! WAAH! WAAH! PrrrrIIIII! PrrrrrIIIII! PrrrrIIII! WooooOOOOOOOIIEEEE! WooooOOOOOOOIIEEEE! WooooOOOOOOOIIEEEE! WooooOOOOOOOIIEEEE! Piiiiooooooouuuuu! Piiiiooooooouuuuu! Piiiiooooooouuuuu! Piiiiooooooouuuuu! WEE! WEE! WEE! WEE! WEE!

Brrrr! Brrreeeeeahhh! Brreeeieiieiei! MwwwrrraaahHHHHHRRRHHH! RrrrEEEAh!

I believe that’s when I started crying.

The cats kept it up for the rest of the night. The noise had riled them up so much they just kept dancing around the house. Brrrr! Brrreeeeeahhh! Brreeeieiieiei! MwwwrrraaahHHHHHRRRHHH! RrrrEEEAh!

Brrrr! Brrreeeeeahhh! Brreeeieiieiei! MwwwrrraaahHHHHHRRRHHH! RrrrEEEAh!

I locked them into separate rooms. They’d still yowl at each other and chew on the carpeting. Taylor was apparently trying to eat his way into the other room.

Brrrr! Brrreeeeeahhh! Brreeeieiieiei! MwwwrrraaahHHHHHRRRHHH! RrrrEEEAh!

So, I’m not the happiest person this morning.

I also learned another valuable lesson last night. I can’t just rely on Eric to make sure I do the right thing. I mentioned before that a large box came for me the other day. Well, I’ve been dying to know what’s in the box because there’s no return address. It’s some company, and just the initials “VSC.”

I was walking to the kitchen last night when I asked Eric, “So, should I just open up the big box and see what’s in it?”

[scripty]
ERIC
Yeah. I want to know what your reader sent you.PAMIE
I should wait until Christmas.

ERIC
Go ahead and open it. Maybe it’s wrapped.

PAMIE
Okay.

(she opens the box)

PAMIE
It’s from Victoria’s Secret!

ERIC
Okay, this has gone too far.

(a lovely white robe falls to the floor.)

PAMIE
Ohhh. Look at that.

ERIC
That’s nice. Who sent you that?

PAMIE
Let me see…. Oh. It’s from your mom!

ERIC
That’s really nice.

PAMIE
I really shouldn’t have opened that.

ERIC
Put it on!

PAMIE
No, I’m putting it back in the box and under the tree and we will pretend we didn’t even open it. Just pretend we didn’t see it and I’ll thank your mom after Christmas.

ERIC
Okay.

PAMIE
Look, you’ve got to be strong when I’m weak, okay?

ERIC
What are you talking about?

PAMIE
When I asked if I should open the box, you should say, “No, wait for Christmas.”

ERIC
But I wanted to know what was in the box! We didn’t know it was from my mom.

PAMIE
But I need you to be strong for me. That’s your job. When there’s only one set of footprints, it should be because you’re carrying me.

ERIC
How about when there’s only one set of footprints it’s because I went to go take a nap…. and you just went on without me.

pause. eric begins to giggle. pamie begins to giggle.

PAMIE
You think you’re pretty funny, don’t you?

ERIC
Come on, baby, that’s pretty funny.

PAMIE
I love you.*

ERIC
I love you, too.*

PAMIE
You complete me.*

ERIC
I live every day for you.*

( * — writer’s interpretation)
[/scripty]

Thank you, Charlotte. It’s wonderful. It will stay under my tree, though, because I feel guilty.

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