Fightin’ Words

I’m going to tell you about the time a lightbulb almost destroyed my relationship, but I can’t do it without a little backstory.

For better or worse, one thing that Jason and I have in common is that we both really like to be right. We can get kind of jerky about it, which means we’re the kind of people who are prone to issue an apology that sounds like, “I can see why you thought I might have meant that.” We don’t mean to be jerks; we just both grew up having to defend ourselves a lot, and I think it makes both of us headstrong in our opinions. It also makes arguments in this house become events better described as Word Offs. We will just beat each other down with constant discussion. Eventually someone will throw up his or her hands and say, “Fine! Whatever you said! That’s what we’ll go with!”

That is the sound of victory around here. Not someone saying, “I’m wrong. I’m sorry.” But someone saying, “You can take this one. I’m so tired.”

It’s still a win, people. Continue reading

Do you take this dork to be your lawfully wedded…

When Tara does recreate her recent fight with Glark while delivering our ceremony, she can have confidence in the fact that my last argument with stee involved him eventually shouting, “I don’t understand the oven! I don’t know how to cook!” and then him grinning from ear to ear at how stupid that all sounds, and then me, knowing that he’s grinning about how much of a fool he is for being scared of the oven (not the stove, he made pains to point out, just the “baking part” of it) giggling while shouting, “Don’t make me laugh when I’m mad at you, DAMMIT!” And then him hugging me going, “I can’t cook. I can’t. Help me.” And then me shouting, “I’m not going to let you make me be unangry. I want to be angry right now. I have to go to the post office and run all of your errands and then make you lunch because you’re scared of the oven.” And then him laughing some more, and me driving away with the biggest dumb grin as I thought, “He makes me CRAZY.” (And then he cooked dinner.)