Fantastic.

Last night we had our first real gathering at our house, followed by our first houseguest.

This morning required a trip to Albertsons to purchase donuts and a plunger.

Hi, I’m officially a homeowner.

Wait, it gets better. Turns out something dug up our front lawn last night. Pieces of lawn gouged out in holes, grass scattered in a menacing, “Get out of here” fashion.

We asked our neighbor if he knew what it was. He peered over the fence, surveyed the damage and nodded.

“Skunks.”

“Skunks?”

“They like to dig holes. They like your lawn. If you look out here at two in the morning sometime, you’ll see them all over your lawn. [The last owner] tried to get rid of them with fox urine, but it didn’t work.”

“What do they want?”

“Who knows. But they dig holes in your lawn. Nothing you can do about it.”

But my new neighbor does not know the power of the internet.

Skunks ripping up my front lawn. Discuss.

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