Here’s the promo for my upcoming Baby Doll Brawl (this Sunday!!). Fun fact: during “and fight their way…” that’s me and my Meteorfight teammate Risky a Go-Go taking out two opposing team members, including their jammer, using her arm and my ass. (And then a few seconds later you can see me fling myself onto the rail in order to avoid a pile-up, where I hang there (but also knock over an opposing team member! yeah? anybody? … okay, fine.)

At the orientation meeting we were told this will be the sixth Baby Doll Brawl in the history of the LA Derby Dolls. This is when Helen Surly Frown turned to me and groaned, “Oh, Holla. You know what that means? We’ve skated in half of them. HALF! We are the oldest Fresh Meat of all time. Rancid, gross, smelly, old meat.”

Come watch the creakiest, hurtingest, oldest rookie skaters take on the newbiest of the noobs when Hell’s Belles defeat the Ice Vixens this Sunday at the Doll Factory. Tickets on sale now. If you’re too far away, you can still support your LA derby girl by watching the live feed.