dear perez.

This is more than I’ve ever thought about you in my entire life, but I figured out why I’m pissed off you stole from my site.

See, I’m out of work right now. I’m on strike. You might have heard about it. Your website has ads. Ads that generate revenue every time someone goes to look at pictures you’ve Photoshopped jizz onto (sorry, Mom. Also, Mom? DON’T CLICK THAT LINK!). You make money off of every click, and that means you’ve had hundreds, if not thousands of little paychecks off my site since you swiped from me, completely uncredited.

So here’s a way for you to actually be a man and do something right in your life. All the money you’re making off ganked material? Please send it to the WGA strike fund, or our Solidarity Fund (for non-WGA members affected by the strike. That’s not you, obviously). That way, at least someone who’s not making a paycheck these days can be reimbursed in some small way for the “juicy gossip” you’re getting these days because we’re walking the line.

(I’d have emailed this request to you personally, but since you haven’t responded to my last email, and I know you’re a fan of my website, I figured this was the quickest way to get you to read. You do read, don’t you?)