I only guilt-tripped you down

I only guilt-tripped you down there because right now I have no shame.  Typing under the influence while in pain makes you do things like that.
I mean, you know.  If you can’t donate a book, that doesn’t make you a bad person or anything.  It just means you can’t donate a book to a library.  I mean, you don’t have to do that. 
You probably didn’t buy me an engagement present, though.  Not that you have to.   But, you know.  I’m just sayin’.
Hey.  You look good.  I like those pants on you. 
Oh.  I found some jeans.  Thanks to those of you who suggested Lucky Brand.  They aren’t made out of paper napkins and they don’t highlight my butt crack.  And I love that you can find them on eBay for much cheaper than in stores.  That’s what I do because I’m broke because I’m the girl who decided to have a house and a wedding in the same year. 
But I still bought some books.  Oooh!  Burn.

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