The Curviest Number

So, I’m thirty. Today.

“Drew Barrymore just turned thirty,” stee says from across the breakfast table. He’s got that tone — hesitantly trying to cheer me up.

That’s how many people have approached me over the past week. “Soo…” they start. “Someone has a birthday…?”

Like they expect me to stop them in the middle of their sentence. “Birthdays are cancelled!” Continue reading

Happy Birthday, Doug


Maybe you’ve come by today to find out why I haven’t called you yet. It would be the first time I haven’t called on your birthday in the seventeen years we’ve known each other. And this day’s even more important– this being your thirtieth birthday. You know I tried. I guess your number has changed since last year. Oddly enough, the man with your number’s name is also Doug, but different wife, different last name, and certainly a different voice than the one I’ve come to quickly identify over the almost two decades we’ve known each other.

Please call or send an email. I’m going to try to find your email address when I get home tonight. You know I would never forget your birthday.

the winners

man, this took forever.

Oh, my God. There’s nothing better than the Bust A Groove soundtrack. I am shaking my ass all over the office. You can’t stop me. I don’t care if I only got four hours sleep. Heat has the best damn song. I swear to God. It rules. Rules. Here’s how much it rules. I’m gonna give it to you. There’s my gift for you. Have fun. Happy Birthday Month (If you got here too late, sorry).

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Like Sixteen Candles

but without jake ryan

How lame is this webpage’s birthday week? Seriously. Last year it was all fun and games, and this year I’m all, “My cat’s big. I’m busy. Do some work for me.”

The good news is I can safely announce one winner of one of the contests. By an overwhelming vote I won the entry design contest. So many of you wrote to ask me to not change the design that I’m going to say that the people have spoken. So, the one design that was sent in (you know who you are) will get a special one-day-only entry when I get back.

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