song: “Give Me Novacaine”

Green Day is the boyfriend you have your sophomore year of high school, the one who likes to talk about poop and thinks it’s funny to push you to the ground and fart on your head. You hate Green Day, but you love Green Day. And one day you decide you are way too mature for Green Day’s bullshit. So…

You break up.

But everybody else still hangs out with Green Day. They don’t care that you moved past it. So you hear about Green Day. What Green Day’s up to. Another album. Everybody loves Green Day. They’re so great.

Then you hear a couple of stories about Green Day. Stories that involve hotel rooms and bad things and one of their songs ends up on a Seinfeld retrospective, which makes you laugh because those guys would have farted on Seinfeld back in the day.

And then, right when you truly don’t care anymore, right when you don’t think about them at all, they make this album. It is something you absolutely can’t ignore.