This Doesn't Make Me Old.

the vh-1 music awards predictions

VH-1 is making a giant stink out of their new award show. Every day I see the billboard outside my apartment reminding me that, just like Albertsons, this is my very special awards ceremony that I decide that’s catered completely all to me.

And since MTV and I are having this terrible on-again-off-again occasional back-alley make-up sex thing, I’m willing to give VH-1 a shot, here. Let’s see if they have something I’d vote on in each category. And we’ll see how I do Thursday night.

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Icy

don’t say the wrong thing to me, mister.

Happy Birthday Matt Sadler.

And if you’re livin’ in the Austin area, come down to the Caucus Club tonight or tomorrow, between 8 and 10 pm for the MOMfest Benefit. Come early to see Eric and Jeff do the famous Slap Happy Pappy sketch, and my ass’ll be doing the less-famous “Genie In A Bottle” sketch. Matt Sadler will be funny, and Chuy and the Ray Prewitt’s Fourth Grade Class are scheduled to appear. Look, I don’t know. I think all of my friends are performing, and it’s for a good cause. Come drink and laugh and groove to some music (I think there are bands, too.) And tell Matt happy birthday week.

Just a quick one here, since I’m working like a crazy person.

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store stories

say i’m the only bee in your bonnet

Yesterday afternoon I stopped in the store to pick up a few items. While wandering though the frozen food section, I saw two young girls staring slack-jawed into one of the freezer doors. I had to see what had stopped them in their tracks. As I approached, I heard one say in a hushed, awed voice, “They make Girl Scout Cookie Ice Cream now.”

I stopped dead in my tracks. I stared at the containers of Thin Mint Cookie Ice Cream. My mouth, too, went slack.

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scattered

random thoughts and plugs

Tonight is preview night for Polaroid Stories.  Preview means it’s basically an open rehearsal where you can come and see the show for free if you’re going to have a hard time coming to see the actual shows on the weekends.  Usually other actors, directors and techies come that night, since they are busy with their own shows on the weekends.  It’ll be interesting.  We haven’t really had an audience yet.  There are parts of this show that get pretty close to the audience.  I’m interested in how they’ll feel.

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Hello. I love you, let me tell you my name

an open letter to Ricky Martin

Dear Ricky Martin,

Yesterday I was coming home from work and I had a terrible scare.  I realized that the entire day yesterday I did not once hear your toe-tapping, butt-shaking, heart-pounding hit “Livin’ La Vida Loca.”  How could that be possible?  There’s no way that your song could ever stop playing on the radio:  it’s too good.  I think you’re better than Britney Spears and N’Sync in one body.

Oh, and your body!  I’m blushing too much to go any further about that.  I only have two words to say about your body:  “Thank you.”

I don’t want you to think that I am writing this letter as any sort of crazed stalker fan.  On the contrary, I happen to have a boyfriend, and I love him very much.  I don’t love him in a Ricky Martin sort of way (that is only reserved for you, dear Ricky) but I love him in a way that I could never love you.  I hope you’re not too upset.  It’s just that when I talk to him, he talks back, and that makes a deeper sort of love.  (But not like the Ricky Martin kind of love, which I’ve already explained to you….)

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