Why Moms Are Here

People like to say, “I bet your mom is so excited to be a grandmother. What did she do when she found out you were having a baby?”

“Oh. She immediately put her house on the market.”

And they laugh. They laugh and laugh. “That would be so funny,” they chuckle.

I don’t say anything. I don’t have to. You can see it in my face, my tired eyes, my worried hair.

Their laughter fades away. They whisper, “Oh, you weren’t kidding.” Read more

Berkeley, Day One

During take-off yesterday, VH-1 distracted me with Grease. Funny, since I’d ripped the theme song earlier that morning.

I can only go so long without dancing and mouthing the words to the film, as it’s my favorite movie. I have tried to come up with something that sounds more like something you call your favorite movie, but this is the truth. I’ve watched this over and over since I was little. Nothing will ever beat it in my heart. This is my movie. There are others I appreciate, and others I love, but nothing will stop me still and have me like this one. anyway… Read more

The Apology.

Dear Child That I Don’t Have, But Might Have Someday,

I feel I owe you an apology.

You see, yesterday afternoon I got a clear vision of your future, and… I’m sorry to say, it doesn’t look pretty.

Oh, it’s all innocent enough, but I got a glimpse of what it’ll be like for you when you one day come home for the holidays to visit your old parents, and I saw your point of view from the back of the car.

Your mother (that’s me) had a pile of un-stamped Christmas cards in her lap, and she was wondering out loud if it would be best to go to Ralphs to buy stamps or if it was just a better idea to go to the post office, because that’s where you can get pretty stamps. Yes, it was just as boring as it sounds now, and if you didn’t fall asleep just reading that paragraph that shows you’ve got some of my genes.

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