Pun Masters! Help name a derby team.

Something fun for your Sunday night:

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Pamie,

So, you’re the main reason I started playing derby. I’ve been following your blog for 10 years or whatever, and Going in Circles happened to coincide with a Derby league forming in my area. Fast forward almost two years later, and I was just named captain of a newly-forming fourth home team.

Since you’re my derby inspiration and you gave your stamp of approval via Twitter to my derby name (Shevil Dead), I was hoping you would have some team name ideas.

Our three current home teams are;

The Vineyard Vixens
The Beltway Betties
The Backwoods Rollers

My colors will be black and gunmetal grey, and I want us to be dark and scary, to set us apart from the other teams.

Some ideas I’ve been kicking around:

The Night Terrors
The LoCo SuperScars (LoCo is a nickname for our county, Loudoun County)
The Nightmare Machines
The LoCo Terrors

If you have any divine inspiration, I would greatly appreciate it!!!

Thanks!

Shevil
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I’m partial to the LoCo Superstars, myself. Have at it in the comments, wonder killers.

How Roller Derby Prepares You For Motherhood (The Crossover)

Dear Pregnant Derby Girl:

Much like roller derby, you probably approached motherhood as something you’d seen before, mostly on TV or the movies, and you felt like you’d be pretty good at it. It does look like fun.

But then you went and did it and just like during your first week of roller derby, you’re thinking, “WHY DIDN’T ANYONE TELL ME IT WOULD BE LIKE THIS? IT IS HARD AND THERE’S ALL THIS PAIN. LOOK WHAT HAS HAPPENED TO MY BODY OH MY GOD ARE THERE DRUGS I CAN TAKE?”

The good news is that because of roller derby, you’re already used to thinking of your body as something other than just your “self.” You know what it’s like to have donated your entire life to a higher calling, a greater good. This prepares you well for both pregnancy and delivery, and eventually for motherhood itself.

You are already used to people – sometimes strangers – poking you, pushing you, touching your boobs and your butt. You don’t even blink when someone puts a hand between your legs and moves you to the side. Weird bruises don’t faze you, neither does blood coming from parts of you that don’t normally bleed like that. You go to the doctor more often than most people. You know it’s just a matter of time before you rip open something important. But this time, girl, that thing you’re ripping open will be your taint. Continue reading

Calling Off the Jam

This weekend my league is holding try-outs for subpool, the tiny team of no-longer-rookies who practice with the team skaters and sub on bouts in hopes of getting drafted to a team. It only happens about twice a year. It’s the first time there have been try-outs since I came back to derby last winter.

I didn’t sign up. Continue reading

Please Help the Bay Area Derby Girls

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Dear friends:

Saturday, July 9, was an evening of mixed blessings for the B.A.D. Girls. After a successful Championship event at the Craneway Pavilion on the Richmond Harbor, league members who were transporting the money raised from the event were robbed at gunpoint.

Thankfully our league members were not injured. However the robbery was not only a shock to our community, but it took our entire financial reserve and profit for the event, totaling thousands of dollars that would have gone towards both future events and our practice venue.

The B.ay A.rea D.erby Girls is a 501(c)(3) and has been entirely volunteer-run since inception. To be robbed of badly needed funds is devastating; to have our league members’ lives threatened is irreparable.

Due to the ongoing investigation, we cannot release further details on the case but we have absolute confidence in the San Francisco Police Department to bring us justice.

While the SFPD works on the investigation, the B.ay A.rea D.erby Girls are in dire need of fundraising. We have always depended on the kindness of our fans and our community. In this time of need, we are reaching out for your generosity once again. Like the strongest jammers, we do not fall after one hit, and we have no intention of allowing truly despicable scumbags who would steal from a non-profit organization to stop us from rolling. If you can please donate to the B.ay A.rea D.erby Girls to recoup some of these financial losses, we would greatly appreciate any amount. Your donation will be fully tax-deductible. In addition, if you can donate items for us to raffle or venue space for us to hold a fundraiser, we promise to make it worth your while and continue to bring you the best roller derby in the Bay Area.

Like the community that we all practice and play in, we are strong. We have always been a league of extraordinary women who are undaunted by obstacles.

Roller derby is a sport that embraces challenges, enables resiliency, and celebrates the spirit of the best in humanity. We intend in honoring that spirit and moving forward from this crime toward a much brighter future with all of you. Thank you again for your support. It means more to us now than it ever has before.

To support the B.A.D. Girls, please donate by clicking the “Donate” button on
our home page. Your donation is tax deductible.

To donate a product or venue space, please email pr at bayareaderbygirls dot com

For press inquiries, please contact Katy Lim at katy at bethechangepr dot com
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here is a test | come try to break pamie dot com

Ever since the shiny new redesign, whenever I let you guys know I have a new post, we somehow succeed in crashing the server. The guys at the help desk are watching right now, so feel free to click a few things.

Like, did you know I have tags? You can read all my posts about roller derby, or Oprah or flip through the remarkably popular dork tag.

Or you can flip through the OCD-skilled archives, picking a month at random.

Whatever gets this site fixed so that I can update more frequently without losing visitors because I have no tolerance for the slow load. Continue reading

I Survived Eat Through Austin

…and then this morning I Googled “master cleanse.”

ooooooohhhhhhhhh man, I am full of food. This year’s food-trip with Tara and Dave was shorter than the last time, but I managed to get an extraordinary amount of eating in. I started strong and ended strong, you guys. I had ice cream for dinner last night. Yes, that is bragging.

We did some antiquing (someone please send me these chairs), some drinking (heh, “some”), and some friend-gathering as we repeatedly hid from the oppressive heat. I recorded a podcast as the first female guest for a future episode of Totally Hungover, which may or may not end up being the last time they allow a female guest. There was officially too much Whataburger and not enough migas. Continue reading

so much derby, not enough skating.

Okay, so maybe I’ll just be writing every weekday. It was just about impossible to get to this thing over the weekend. Sorry about that. Even Dewey got a little quiet after that late-night dance party fun. We’re almost at 100 donations, so please continue to spread the word. I think this book drive will only be for another week, and we’re about to hit 300 books sent. We’ve emptied out three wishlists, which is fantastic, but they still could use some children’s books and YA. Won’t you send a book? Just one book? Look what a difference just one book makes in their after school program! Continue reading