Tag: Crazy People

  • This just happened on my Facebook chat.

    This just happened on my Facebook chat.

    Tilda Whirl: TELL ME EVERYTHING ABOUT JON HAMM. Me: HE IS DREAMY AND WAS WEARING A SUIT AND AT ONE POINT WE MADE EYE CONTACT BEFORE HE POINTED BEHIND ME TOWARD THE BATHROOMS BECAUSE I GUESS HIS FRIEND HAD TO PEE.

  • Why I’m Missing Mindy Kaling’s Book Signing (More Proof I Can Never Be Cool)

    So I’ve had this cold. It’s been going on for over a week at this point, which is ridiculous. Listen, if I go through all the trouble to be responsible and get the flu shot before flu season, I shouldn’t be able to get sick for ten days straight with anything. I should get credit…

  • The day I have to finally admit that I might be rapidly turning into Hoda.

    The day I have to finally admit that I might be rapidly turning into Hoda.

    I’ve mentioned before, but probably not on pamie.com, that I watch Kathie Lee and Hoda most mornings. That’s not exactly true — I have it on while I’m working. Depending on which part of the house I choose to work from that day (couch if I’m feeling frustrated, desk if I’m feeling self-punishey), I will…

  • These Boots Are Made for Mocking

    Dear Stacy: UPDATE. These boots you helped me find, both are going back. The Frye “banana” is really more of a tan, and might work if I popped it with a crazy red or that blue you were coveting. That being said, it fits like a galosh, and is really pooling around my ankles. The…

  • Photographic Evidence of the Last Time I Will Ever Be In This M’fn Convenience Store

    Photographic Evidence of the Last Time I Will Ever Be In This M’fn Convenience Store

    I hope you like this picture I took last night, even though it’s not a good picture. I’m looking for some kind of bright side to what happened after I’d taken it. I’d been waiting in line for a long time. Long enough to look up, see these lights and think, “Why?” After I paid…

  • happy friday.

    happy friday.

    Last night. I was sound asleep. Then I heard screaming. A man, screaming, “I’LL KILL YOU! I’LL KILL YOU! I’LL KILL YOU! I’LL KILL YOU!” I bolt up in my bed and stare at the window. My heart is racing, but my brain is not quite fully awake, but Wonder Killing: No, you know that…

  • whole lotta kolache

    whole lotta kolache

    I woke up this morning and wanted sausage kolaches. Like, two kolaches. This is because you other homesick Texans have been sending me email about food I’ve forgotten about, and Lis sent the link to the Homesick Texan’s kolache recipe.

  • suck it, movable type.

    To those of you who have written to say that your obsessive desire to read every single one of my archived entries has been thwarted by server problems, I say: “I fixed the archives.” And: “Please share some of your spare time with real, live humans.”

  • week six. more honking, less cheering.

    So apparently I walked right past Jane Espenson today, because I was staring at the guy she was walking with, thinking, “There’s Doyle from Gilmore Girls! And on my other side I’m walking past Peter Krause for the fiftieth time!” Sorry, Jane. I really wanted to meet you. That’s a much better story than what…

  • Picket Lung

    I know it’s important during week four to keep up the fight, the resolve, the rah-rah-rah, but here on week four, day four, I have woken up with a serious case of Picket Lung. That’s the Radiohead song Laura House and I wrote yesterday while we walked, because we picket in a very active construction…