Recent podcast appearances

I link to things on Twitter and Facebook, but never come here to post them, so if you’re looking for places to hear me talk about work/process/being awkward in public, here you go. This is also a list of some fantastic podcasts/people.

GILMORE GUYS: These guys are so funny. They invited me to gab about episode 502, “A Messenger, Nothing More.” TWoP fans will enjoy this trip down memory lane. Newer readers might be shocked to see just how easily I can slip back into a snarky asshole.

SHE DOES | Conversations with Creative Minds: Elaine and Sarah are smart, funny and sweet. They also interview some of the most fascinating women in media. I was flattered to be invited to share my own story. My episode: Finding Your Own Fun.

CHICKS WHO SCRIPT: Three powerhouse ladies in film with a whole lot to say. My episode: Pam Ribon and the Big Personality

The following aren’t recent, but you might still enjoy them:

THIS AMERICAN WIFE: Eric Martin is so calm and cool that I end up dorking out like you wouldn’t believe. And yet, he had me on his show TWICE. Episode 73: Only the Young and Episode 56: Side Gigs. Eric folded this podcast shortly after our last interview. He said it wasn’t not not entirely my fault.

BOOK CIRCLE ONLINE: This was a fun one. We discuss Notes to Boys, writing online and Anne Heche.

THE SEND-UP: Robyn and I talk about writing comedy for TV as a lady person, Sassy Magazine, asking for Tom Selleck and getting Harry Hamlin, and being in a twenty person improv troupe. The episode is here.

The day I have to finally admit that I might be rapidly turning into Hoda.

I’ve mentioned before, but probably not on pamie.com, that I watch Kathie Lee and Hoda most mornings. That’s not exactly true — I have it on while I’m working. Depending on which part of the house I choose to work from that day (couch if I’m feeling frustrated, desk if I’m feeling self-punishey), I will let the TV do its thing from The Today Show all the way to that silly fourth hour of booze and constant chit-chattering. It makes me feel like I’m at an office, stuck in a corporate job I can’t stand, and I’ve got Kathie Lee and Hoda at the next cube going on and on and on about a movie one liked that the other didn’t that starred an actor whose name they can’t remember, or they’re ranting about a young starlet whose behavior they don’t understand, or sometimes — unfortunately — Kathie Lee’s talking about her sex life with her husband. But they really do make me feel better about my drinking, as most days I wait until at least after two to drink as much as these two sloshy ladies Continue reading

Writing Elsewhere: Hello Giggles

Have you heard about Hello Giggles? It’s the brand-new brainchild of impressive (and funny) ladies Zooey Deschanel, Sophia Rossi, and Molly McAleer. Hello Giggles is all about daily, girl-friendly content. In other words, the site feels like drinking a Diet Coke while listening to your favorite jam.

I’m flattered they’ve asked me to be a contributor. My first article is up for my column “I Hate Myself For Buying This.” It’s called How One Bottle of Grey Nail Polish Has Made Me Too Important. It already appears to have the potential to start a flame war.

The Magical Vulva of Opportunity

I read Tina Fey’s Bossypants over the weekend, because as a lady who writes comedy it is some kind of law. They sent something to my house; it was very official. And because I’m a lady who writes comedy who also likes extra credit, I went to see Tina speak with Steve Martin last week, where I truly couldn’t walk five steps without running into or recognizing another woman I’d either worked with or had a meeting with or interviewed with or knew through comedy since moving to Los Angeles. (I also held the World’s Smallest Impromptu Book Signing, wherein I defaced Tina Fey’s Bossypants.)

I bring this up for a couple of reasons. It’s staffing season, which means right now writers are waiting to find out which shows are going to staff which writers, depending on which shows get picked up for the fall season, and it’s all very hurry-up-and-wait while your scripts get sent to network executives, showrunners, assistants and trashcans. Continue reading

Weeeee! You I You Weeee Meeeee Meeee! Youuuuu! They You I Meeeeee They Us!

We all have those dreams where we think of the most brilliant joke or story and when we wake up we forget what it was. If we do remember the joke — usually in the shower or on the drive to work, when our brains go back to slumber-numb — it’s usually a letdown.

I had a dream I tweeted this joke. In the dream it was so important to me that I tweet this joke, that I interrupted a fancy dinner and I think even someone speaking at the front of the room. I had a dream that I was a total asshole, just so I could write a joke before I forgot it.

I even remember the joke.

Muse loves singing about pronouns. (see: “WE!” and “THEY!”) Muse loves pronouns so much that even their name is a mash-up of two pronouns.

Genius dream joke or too much grammar humor? I don’t care. Muse really does love to hit their pronouns.

Cereal Killer

You know the kind of funny where someone’s pissed off about something and it makes you laugh, and then the more that person goes on ranting the funnier it gets and by the end you’re like, holding your breath so you can hear what she’s saying instead of just laughing? It can happen when you’re reading, too. Bunting just did that to me with Mueslix.

6 Honey Nut Cheerios vs. 11 Muesli(x). We had a box of muesli on our cereal shelf as a kid — the hardcore no-brand Bavarian-prison kind. I bet you a dollar that it’s still there, and that there’s still the same amount of “cereal” in it as 25 years ago, because Mr. S and I peered into the box, once, saw all this forest-floor nonsense like bark and twigs and dung-beetle carapaces and whatnot, and put it back on the shelf and never had anything to do with it again. Fine, provide your offspring with some fiber, but…some fiber. Not all of it. What am I, a termite? I’m sure Mueslix is not nearly as challenging, but hell if I’m going to try it and find out. Honey Nut Cheerios in a landslide.

Make your vote count here.

Samantha Who? Returns: March 26th, 8:30/7:30c

Oh, thank God, we are back on the air. But only for like, six weeks. So, tell your friends! Tell everybody. Please. Aren’t you sick of my constant twittering and my sad youtube posts yet? Save me from unemployment. Please put us all back to work with lovely, lovely ratings.

I’m embedding the promo, which I never do because I don’t ask you to watch commercials, but I was so excited to see so many little clips from the episode I wrote (“THE DOG,” airing April 2nd), including that “record-scratch” moment where the talented Jean Smart talks about Samantha’s biological clock. I wrote that joke! It somehow lasted from first draft! That never happens! Seriously!

[Future Pam editing this page says: “Aw. This is sad, how you can’t even see the old promo anymore.”]

Some of you are like, “Dude, weren’t you working on that joke like, a million years ago?”

Yes.

Ain’t Hollywood fun?

[Oh, and my friend David was published in Nature, which is way cooler and much more important than anything I’ll ever do in my entire life. He’s awesome.]