Eminem: The Marshall Mathers LP

Song: “Kim

I should put quotations around the word “Song” as well.

This song was playing on the iPod the other day when stee said, “I’m really glad those two decided to get married again. A love story for the ages.” And then the screaming got too loud and I had to change the song.

But… this does segue into a great story about my sister.


Bosie had the Eminem cranked up in her car as we were driving home Christmas afternoon. Mom was knitting in the backseat, seemingly uninterested in the conversation we were having in the front. Bosie probably doesn’t realize this, but every time I’ve been in her car the music has changed to Eminem at some point, and she tells me again why she loves Eminem. She loves his passion, his lyrics, the way he talks about life and drugs and why it’s so damn hard to love someone when they’re so fucking stupid all the time you just have to beat the shit out of them and stuff them into a trunk.

Theoretically speaking.

Anyway, as Bosie is telling me about how awesome Eminem is, my mother interrupts in the backseat with a tsk that silenced everything.

“If he’s so good at poetry, why does he have to use all those swear words?” Mom asks.

“Because he’s talking about the life he knows,” Bosie says. “And he’s using the words he uses every day to express himself, so it sounds like him.”

“Sounds like trash.”

My sister rolled her eyes and turned the volume up.

About an hour later we were sitting in the living room, when Bosie started humming a familiar song.

It has the chorus:

If you wanna be happy
For the rest of your life
Never make a pretty woman your wife
So for my personal point of view
Get an ugly girl to marry you.

“I’ve always hated that song,” I say.

And Bosie says, “Yes, well, at least it doesn’t have any curse words. That’s why it’s a golden oldie. A classic for generations. Everybody, teach your children the words and play it loudly on the radio because it doesn’t have any cursing at all! It’s beautiful.”

I love my sister.